My friend Jane McGinnis just requested a post about the difference between “Jean and I” and “Jean and me.” Consider it done, Jane!

Here’s how you figure it out: Shorten the problem sentence, and you’ll instantly hear the right word.

First, write any sentence – any sentence at all – with “Jean and I” or “Jean and me.” It’s ok to guess! (I know, I know. An English teacher just fell to the floor. Don’t worry – we’ll revive her in a minute.)

Jean and I went to the store.

Me and Jean went to the store.

Let Jean and I know when you need a ride.

Let Jean and me know when you need a ride.

Obviously some of those sentences are wrong – but which ones? Here’s how you figure it out: just delete Jean and. (This “make the sentence shorter” trick can solve many grammar and usage problems.)

 I went to the store.

Me went to the store.

Let I know when you need a ride.

Let me know when you need a ride.

Once you get your short sentence right, you’ll instantly know the answer. After that it doesn’t matter how many names you add (Jean, Carol, Lucy, and Dave). If I is the right word for your short sentence, use I in the long one. If me is the right for for your short sentence, use me in the long one.

You’ll be right 100% of the time. (How many things are you familiar with that work 100% of the time? Isn’t this trick wonderful? I used to call this the “thumb rule” – you use your thumb to make the sentence shorter – and it was fun to watch my students carefully covering the words with their thumbs)

I went to the store.

Jean and I went to the store.

Jean, Carol, Lucy, Dave and I went to the store.

Let me know when you need a ride

Let Jean and me know when you need a ride.

Let Jean, Carol, Lucy, Dave and me know when you need a ride.

Now we can pick up that English teacher off the floor, and I can add a few comments:

1. Many people mistakenly think that “I” is always right and “me” is always wrong. I’ve had people correct me when I was using “me” properly in a sentence! “I” sounds more elegant, so some people overuse it. Don’t get tricked that way.
2. English teachers love to do these pronouns the hard way. Ask them whether “I” or “me” is correct, and you’ll get a long lecture about pronoun case, transitive verbs, and subjective and objective pronouns. If I had to work through those concepts every time I started to speak or write, I’d never get anything done. Forget about formal grammar – you don’t need it.
3. I am waging a lonely but valiant battle about a new mistake that’s making its way into the language. Here’s an example:

I bought a housewarming present for he and Marilyn.  WRONG, WRONG, WRONG, WRONG

Let’s try our “shorten the sentence” trick:

I bought a housewarming present for him.  CORRECT

I bought a housewarming present for him and Marilyn.  CORRECT

When I hear this mistake, I sharply set the person straight, right on the spot. If it’s on TV or in print, I foam at the mouth for a while and then write a stern letter. (Colin Powell got one of my letters. I received a lovely apology from him.)

Any questions? You can download a free handout that explains every pronoun rule you’ll ever need (there are only three of them!) at this link: Pronouns Made Simple.