I enjoy reading rules about writing. Even when I disagree with them (something that happens often), reading and thinking about rules always awakens new ideas and unexpected possibilities.
I just came across a rule I really like: If it’s boring to you, it’s boring to your reader.
Amen, brother. Amen!
One of my personal Rules for Living – and one that spills over into my Rules for Writing – is “Never tell people something they’ve heard before.” Alas, it’s a rule that I violate frequently. But still it has saved me (and, more important, my friends and family) from many trips down the Highway of Boredom. Here’s a list of strategies I’ve found helpful:
1. Check in with my stomach. I know that sounds strange, but it works great. If my stomach is humming, I can be confident that I haven’t lapsed into boredom. If my stomach feels dead, it’s time to find a different topic or another approach – or simply shut up.
2. Don’t try to impress people. Surefire pathway to boredom.
3. Tell a story (preferably one with a surprise – or one that pokes fun at me).
4. Go somewhere unexpected. I used to teach nontraditional college students who hadn’t acquired the habits needed for academic success. Lecturing them about responsibility/hard work/success and so on was both a waste of time and a serious violation of my sacred “Never tell them what they’ve heard before” rule.
What to do? I used to show my classes a clip from Mona Lisa Smile. Julia Roberts is an art history professor who’s teaching her first class in a topnotch college for women. She discovers that her students have already read the entire textbook and supplementary materials.
It’s wonderful to watch her try to cope gracefully with the situation – the students have outstripped her expectations, making her feel irrelevant and diminished. But the scene also makes a point that the movie producers probably didn’t intend: A real education requires preparation and effort.
That’s my list, and all that remains is a question (an honest one, because I have another rule about never asking a question if I already know the answer): Did I bore you?
